If celebrities DON'T have a sex tape for me to see, I don't want to hear about who they're dating. #celebrity"news"shows

Awkward silences are OK, because they happen with people that need to shut the hell up anyway. The alternative is an awkward pimp slap.

There's not giving a crap...and then there's aggressively and overtly not giving a crap...thus my feelings about American Idol now.

I guess it didn't work with the hot neighbor and I because I'm not a cheating Identity thief like her last two dudes. I draw the line there.

I lip sync and air guitar during the opening theme to "CSI Miami"....EVERY TIME. Deal with it.

As far as I'm concerned, the "New Year" doesn't start until Monday morning...

I don't need a calorie count on the menu at fast food places...give me a probability of spit in my grub. Or the IQ of the employees. Thanks.