Breaking Fake News! Kleenex stock hits an all time high as John Boehner sworn in as speaker of the house. Film at 6 & 11!

I want my brother's teacher so much that I WON'T sleep with her. Why? Because I'd do IT ALL to her... and that usually creates stalkers.

Hi teens, it's your adult relatives talking...we will NOT let you have sex in OUR homes. You mess up OUR sex lives we mess up YOURS. Ha!

Have you ever seen a puppy try to walk across a newly waxed floor? That's what watching teen relatives "pick up" ladies is like. FUNNY!

The NEW Congress is in, party time!... If by party one means NOTHING will get done and people are about to get fu*ked...just like before.

Hey, "Average Size" women...I've had sex with "Magazine Model" type women. It feels BETTER to be belly to belly naked with YOU. Dig?

Phuk eet!

You have to really trust a person to let them tie you up. Trust me. But tape, feel free tom let anyone do THAT. STOP BEING A WHIMP!!

Caring less and less is getting easier and easier...

Instead of taking The "N" word out of Huckleberry Finn, take it out of the brains of millions of bigots.