Finally, there will be several days of 60 plus degrees! Ladies, I look forward to daydreaming about your delicious newly uncovered bodies!!

90 minutes of foreplay (up from 45) for the next woman I'm in a relationship with. (See NFL, that's how you bring people to the table)

Aaah, sometimes not giving a sh!t feels as good as slipping into a hot bath after a long day...

I would write a tell all book...but jokes are faster and more fun.