“Life is like a box of chocolates, you keep putting your fingers in and eating…..come to think of it…life then would be more like your woman’s (Redacted)…you know, with the whole fingers and eating…I’ll get back to you….”
I hate when people compliment you so you'll do something. One guy said "You are so good at NOT kicking my ass!" "Thanks...wait a minute!"
It amazes me how gullible people are. Some people believe obvious lies. Gotta go now...I'm having a threesome with the Williams sisters.
Is there an "ADULT Protective Service?" Let's be real here, with flash mobs, texting while driving etc...kids are more likely to kill US!
So...you're saying groin nuzzles haven't replaced butt slaps as congratulations? Sorry lady. *Whispers to friend* "I'm not sorry"
My doctor now uses pimp slaps to extract blood for testing...so...I'm putting together a list of people I don't like to recommend him to.
My back window is my reality TV. It's better actually because when the characters get annoying I can hit them with a fu*king egg. (And I do)
If you can make your woman’s toes curl she’ll have a hard time leaving you. Either become great in bed…or make sure she gets rickets.