Friday, April 9, 2010

The S. Man Says...

A guy at a swap meet tried to sell me USED underwear...USED! Finally...someone who understands me. Wait...what?

When I think about it, "Planned Parenthood" IS a much better name than "Ha you!"

Fishing, Hunting, Rock climbing etc...not just fun activities, but built in plausible deniability if you ever have to kill a friend.

I'm a people pleaser. No, that's not a euphemism your honor....I don't care what that film says.

Man, the doorknob at this church is burning's not to you? Oh. This is gonna be a long Sunday. #awayfromchurchtoolong

I am NOT on any prescription drugs. That will change soon because my neighbor is about to leave for work.

Why does cheese taste better melted...and why is a woman more sexy after the restraining order? Whoa... sounded less scary in my head.

"Look at that bitch, she thinks she's cute. She's a slut, letting everybody touch all over her!" #jealouskindlesseeinganipadforthefirsttime

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