Hello. I'm S. Anthony...

Do fries come with that shake girl? No, I'm not hitting on your daughter, I'm ordering lunch. Hand me my pants please, I need my wallet.

Uh, raisins aren't supposed to walk, right? Ok...taking this bagel back....

DO NOT streak a police station! Talk about police brutality! "Do some sit ups buddy!" Bastards. I'm telling internal affairs!

I'm laughing as the crazy left handed guy tries to stab me with scissors. Well, time to shoot this guy *click* crap, it's a left handed gun!

No officer, she chloroformed herself and jumped in the trunk. Don't get mad at ME because YOU don't know the latest stalker profiles!

Is it still "Schadenfreude" if it's meticulously planned? I'm asking for a buddy because I'll have an alibi for Tuesday, when it happens.

S.O.S.? (Save "OUR" ship) Don't you mean S.T.S.? (Save "THE" ship). I'm sure you don't OWN the ship! I am not inclined to save liars!

...oh yeah? Well screw you lady! I hope you get chased by a pack of M*l G*bsons!

Special message to 70's era kung fu movie stars, when you flex your muscles and it makes a crunching sound...SEE A DOCTOR IMMEDIATELY!