Wednesday, October 12, 2011

When I see people here and in "real life" disrespect the Occupy Wall Street and other cities's like seeing a show called "INTERNET TROLL LIVE!"

Most people think that I do comedy for a living. Silly people. The real money I make comes from my "Teaching daytime talk show audiences how to sound outraged by the guests behavior" classes. I...AM...SO...BUSY!

Gorgeous women with horrible names....your mom was hating on you. Just thought you should know.

Armpit hair + tank top = ice cubes in my lap.

Had a lady that looked & acted like "Whitney", we had endless bed smashing sex...why did I leave again? Oh, the craziness...

6 months.... I will have my old body back. I will then bring back streaking.

Two words. Medical Crack.

If you use red ink on your "rejection" stamp you are a HUGE ass.

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