My philosophy of life? EVERYONE deserves love and respect...so try and give it to them. Also...avoid dickheads. I have spoken!

A straw man is an informal fallacy based on misrepresentation, just watch talking heads on cable news describe Occupy Wall Street Protests.

Congress, didn't you know that WHORES are supposed to make people feel GOOD? And yes, you are WHORES.

It's the 10th anniversary of me convincing that stripper with the triple G boobs that my saliva would hold her pasties on. Yeah, I rule.

Dear Herman Cain, your lead in the polls is a football, the primary voters are Lucy. Guess who you are?  *Charlie Brown theme plays*

Imagine a person tied to a chair watching the criminals beat each other up over the wallet they just stole from them. That's America now.

DO good stuff, DON'T do bad stuff. The end. Self help authors, you aren't needed anymore. See yourselves out please.

When I make love I play the song "Iron man", so the neighbors wont hear "This NEVER happens to me!" I mean hear her screams. STOP LAUGHING!!