Special message to women who do the "Hot School girl" look....cut it out. That crap is gross and weirds me out. Thanks.

Maury...DAILY paternity tests, Regis....works with Kelly Ripa (Lots of kids). What's with old white dudes on TV and pregnant women?

I'm practicing my drop kick in preparation for the next unreasonable request for my time from my relatives...

I am so glad that Tucker Carlson didn't become a traffic cop.

Singapore style caning = END of prison overcrowding AND hot new reality series on MTV. You're welcome world!

I want a nude Angelina Jolie & Halle Berry to play ME in the movie of my life. No resemblance, but if I'm producer, I get to be on the set.