S. Anthony Says...

I was hit on last night by a woman so together and so off of the charts beautiful that I still think it's a really a practical joke...

I can't wait to get married someday. To go from getting laid occasionally to getting laid a little more than occasionally. Lucky bastards!

If I step in dog poop, I should be able to return it to the dog owner...in any way that I see fit.

....Gone fishing...for compliments. How's my hair look?

Can I get a witness!?!... DO NOT yell that anywhere near the Watchtower Society. Just sayin'...

See a penny, pick it up and all day long you'll have dog piss on your fingers.

As an adult I'm embarrassed at the way people speak to each other. What a wonderful world it would be if politicians were adults too.

I was checking my pockets for my keys and touched my balls by accident...(yes accident shut up!) Can I sue myself for harassment?