I have a 60 min version of Hulk Hogan's theme "Real American" that I play in the background during lovemaking. Yes, I use it when alone too.

Don't try to save money buy purchasing P90a. Trust me, I'm now 700 pounds.

People want personal space when you're BEHIND them too...but I say, DON'T have such a cute butt lady. Nice gun. Bye.

How are the lawyers in TV ads going to convince a jury to give you money, when they can't convince me that they graduated grade school?

Doing the pantomime from Jerry Lewis' "Errand Boy" at the restaurant on a first date will NOT get you any action. You have been warned.

Today's the 10th anniversary of my failed feminine hygiene product "Damn girl, you stink!" .That's when an inventor died & a comic was born.