Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Me: This soccer game is great!

My friend: Yeah, I stopped playing because I couldn't keep taking all those balls in the face.

Me: (Guess)

Why hate another person's success? Just wait for it to all crash down on them...THEN laugh at the *bastid! (*bastard with East Coast accent)

Nothing tastes better than your woman after a shower. Yeah, YOUR woman.

Dear extremist congressmen, show me on the congressional page's genitals what you won't admit to wanting to do to the other page's genitals.

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