No! I DON'T want to coach The Eagles! Damn, you guys are freaking desperate!

S. Anthony's hot new single "I'm a comic not a singer so what the hell am I releasing a single for?" is in stores NOW!!

I would only care about a celebrities pregnancy if I had at some point ejaculated in her. Other than that.....uh....no.

The buttons on YouTube should be LOVE or HATE because neither LIKE or DISLIKE is enough to make ME click shit.

Did the football announcer just say "He was stopped way before he could penetrate!"? Tee hee....


Tongue jacuzzis. Ladies?

You're right Dateline NBC, brutal murders ARE entertaining! (Uh...no)