It Black Friday soon, the day when they follow EVERYONE around like they're going to steal shit.

Just so you know, you CAN love someone AND wish they'd shut the fuck up.

I DON'T  wait for my steak to get cooked. I just bite cows on their asses. Yeah! #REALMan

John McCain watches the civil rights documentary "Eyes on the Prize" and yells "Unqualified!" at the screen for practice.

Watching these old sitcoms makes ME want to go to a vintage clothing store and buy some "You can't NOT see my balls jeans". You're welcome.