"Marco?"
"Polo!"
"Amerigo?"
"Vespucci!"

*other kids show up*

"Those two are a couple of a-holes!"

When you say, "She's out of your league", you mean she's out of YOURS.
I own my own league fool!
(FYI, I'm already dating HER tee hee)

"FYI, when a criminal smiles in a movie, he's going to go back on the arms deal and shoot you."
- S. Anthony advises movie characters

Dear people still scared at horror movies...
Really? I bet the microwave bell makes you crap your pants too.

Dear NSA, I don't appreciate you cutting into my phone call to ask me if I'm "Hitting it"...I mean if you were so good you'd know that I am!

Guys in movies must really love their wives. I mean, going against the mob? The divorce rate is still over 50%, right? Hmmm?