"I think the boy is still alive. It's a false flag by the Obama administration!"
- Alex Jones watches the Zimmerman trial
#fakequote

"Why in a bucket? Was a teenage girl in there?"
- R. Kelly hears about Bieber peeing into a bucket

I am now announcing my candidacy for President of coolsville.
Feel free to congratulate me AND leave promises that you'll vote for me.

Spankings as a kid: 0
Spankings as an adult: 500
Yup, adulthood is better.

I must admit...that four hour special on Fox News about Trayvon Martin's "eerily sharp" hangnail was riveting.