Dear rich people who want to do GOOD things, outbid the people who do bad things so YOU can own the whores in the Government. #justathought

I want someone to put subtitles under me so you can tell I'm cursing you out under my breath.

North Korea. I'm so afraid of you, I'm stocking up on ketchup packets and cans of spam. Come to think of it, eating THAT shit would kill me.

Iced coffee was probably invented by the same contrarian that created fat free ice cream.

The guys who set prices at the pawn shops and all night convenience stores would kill each other for ridiculous price supremacy if they met.