When I'm about to get it on, I take off my pants and say "Is THAT your card?" If they don't smile at THAT joke...no orgasm for them.

(Smart + Cute) x Available = (Me + You + Endless Powerbanging) - Time for much else

For the first year or so, THEN we'll still get in on constantly but we'll mix in other activities

*Ladies only

"Michelle Bachmann is hot and sexy and I'd make love to her all night long!"

- NOT her husband Marcus Bachmann ever

The moment you find out that you have many fewer friends than you thought... and were okay with it.

Can we all agree to only use the suffixes "xxx-gate" & "xxx-mageddon" for SERIOUS things from NOW on instead of traffic jams & junk pics on the web?