"Facts" about S. Anthony Thomas:

Pistol whips himself in front of muggers to show them who REALLY is boss

Borrows sugar from mean neighbors and puts it in their own gas tanks because he believes in revenge AND not wasting HIS money

Taught baby seals hand to hand combat skills.... watch out poachers....SHIT IS ABOUT TO BE ON!

 Stopped the rain

So thoughtful, he gave Santa a *gift.

*The gift was "helping" Mrs. Claus reach the "North Pole" as he watched by Roudolph's nose light

Decided to throw salt straight down and not over his shoulder. He is currently sleeping with 14 supermodels after his lottery win.

Put a condom on backwards and now has a baby hanging out of his ass.