Ladies, I just want to let you know...coffee isn't your ONLY hot, coffee colored, cream filled morning option. I'm also available... ;-)
I have NEVER seen Lost, Glee, Jersey Shore, Dancing With the Stars, Twilight or Harry Potter. F*ck you marketing pervasiveness!!!
Okay...the next person on Facebook that reacts seriously to what obviously was a joke...WILL BE VOTED OFF OF THE ISLAND! That is all.
You know that you have a f*cked up family when critical thinking, compassion and reason make YOU the aberration.
I was going to buy a video game system, but the clerk said "No! You've actually had sex WITH A REAL WOMAN! We don't sell to YOUR kind!"
If you're eating Apple Jacks at 12:36am...your life took a bad turn. No, no! I said if YOU are it's bad. It's cool when I do it...*crying*
Getting caught in your zipper is embarrassing, even more if a homeless guy is wearing your pants at the time. #latenightstreetswordfight
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