Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day, teach a man and he'll think, "Does this motherf*cker know there is a supermarket right there?"

I drew a bath and now I have an ass covered in paper cuts. Just kidding, the paper cuts were already there. The ink marks are new...

Passionate lovemaking burns hundreds of calories, boning your neighbor's sister burns your car and almost your house. 

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