Women think it's charming when I call their boob sweat "Titty Gravy".
 I must be cute...

A real man motorboats butt cheeks too.

You gave me a FORK with my chili? WHAT AM I AN ANIMAL!?!

"Karaoke" is Japanese for "I'm trying to make you kill me in public"


Answer: "I can't believe it's not butter"
Question: "Okay, if you're to lazy to go to the store for lube what are you going to use?"