It's grape the new Apple watch will pear with my computer, orange you going to get one?

*gets wedgied, pimp slapped and a pie in the face*

If you saw the way I just reacted to stepping on a rubber band in my bare feet, you'd probably put a spoon over my tongue and call 911.

I don't NEED Viagra, but I'm going to take some because I hate people standing close to me on long subway rides.